How's your health lads ? No joking matter

[Ross, Bob]

Managed to break my toe

Do you really need it though?

[TheMalteseDart]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

[The Thorn]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Were you at the same party as Deadshot ffs

Get better you cunts

[Jimmi]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

[TheMalteseDart]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I don’t think so but it is a possibility

[The Thorn]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I tried but I couldn't get it up

[Jimmi]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I don’t think so but it is a possibility

So it was a bukkake party?

[Jimmi]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I tried but I couldn't get it up

Used up too many wanks?

[The Thorn]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I tried but I couldn't get it up

Used up too many wanks?

Yeah I had a few tugs before I went there. We agreed with Malt that we wouldn't get sexual with each other as we value our friendship more.

[Jimmi]

Got so drunk last night i can’t remember getting home and also for some reason can’t open my right eye. Was at my friends surprise birthday party and I at least behaved myself when there so it’s all good. Health is in a sorry state this morning though

Did someone spunk in your eye?

I tried but I couldn't get it up

Used up too many wanks?

Yeah I had a few tugs before I went there. We agreed with Malt that we wouldn't get sexual with each other as we value our friendship more.

That’s cute.

[Suspect Device]

I have an Inguinal hernia, (just above the groin area). The female Dr at the surgery will see to me. Hope the bearded bloke doesn't step in as a late replacement.

Anyone here had it? Mine is a constant dull ache like having your balls half squeezed, but enough to make your eyes water.

Standing up can make it worse. Ie, on your feet for hours trying to throw darts. Eases by lying down...does it fuck!

[The Thorn]

Never had it

Get well

[Suspect Device]

It's ok I'm not dead yet. A Dr will phone you. A text arrived with 1 new voicemail. I listened and it was a Dr saying he phoned etc. The Cunting phone never rang once! I phoned surgery to let them know. I Will let the Dr know what happened and phone you again. What a load of bollocks. Same thing is likely to happen. Get back into the surgery you Cunts and see Your patients face to face, not hiding at home with a bottle whiskey in hand. Cunts!

[Suspect Device]

2nd phone call, can you get here in 5 mins or I'll see you in 2 hrs? I'm on my way. Prodded and probed but no bollocks were tickled. It's a hernia, Ultrasound request sent to see if anything is underlying. Then I'll go on the list for surgery.

[Deadshot]

Made the mistake of going round to one of the missus' mates for tea last night. Dozy cow cooked chicken, it was dry and yet my arse is back on suicide watch today.

[Deadshot]

In a strange twist of fate, my arse has now gone on strike. Not curled out a fecal formation for over two days, and rather bloated at present. Advice needed

[Captain Hobo]

In a strange twist of fate, my arse has now gone on strike. Not curled out a fecal formation for over two days, and rather bloated at present. Advice needed

Laxatives. I'm sure Randall can recommend his favourite brand.

[Deadshot]

Still no appearence from my arse. Starting to get a little bit concerned

[Mabbsy]

Left eye vision issues, most peculiar, hospital said it will clear in a couple.of months, ok thanks

[Randall]

Left eye vision issues, most peculiar, hospital said it will clear in a couple.of months, ok thanks

What's happening mate?